Things that are within our control, we can change.
Seems like not many things fall into this category.
Some, on the other hand, will never change no matter what i do.
Maybe it will, or at least thats what im trying to delude myself with.
Maybe it was never meant to be this way.
Maybe i am deserving of this.
Maybe i killed too many ants in my previous life.
Maybe it is bad karma for bad people like me.
Maybe im just fated to never get what i want.
Maybe its because i dont even know what i want anymore.
Maybe...
im just making too many excuses.

Live and let live.
Not that theres much to live for anyway.
and no im not contemplating suicide.
I will kill you before that happens :)